Firstly, hi, it's been a while. And secondly, I cannot even believe that Halloween is now in the past tense and that the holidays are right around the corner! Eek!!!! How on earth did this year fly by so quickly?

Anywho, after my last post being all about letting go of heavy stuff, throwing actual rocks, adopting a Wonder Woman pose to trigger some confidence, et cetera, I wanted to talk a little bit more about confidence. But I also want to talk about fear, or rather, recognizing and accepting fear, making friends with it, and moving forward with things. Whatever the things may be.

I don't think I'm alone in feeling that it's a constant dance between these two polar opposites, with Confidence leading occasionally, but most often Fear steals the lead.

In the past, I have sincerely wished that Confidence would toss Fear to the ground and do a fabulous solo. However, over the last little chunk of time, I've been looking for ways to befriend the fearful one. To find ways to live with her, accept her, and do the scary stuff despite her presence. She is a part of me and my life, only now I just make her come along for the ride, rather than letting her talk me into staying away from the stuff I'm afraid to do.

Before going any further, let me show you what I believe to be a perfect example of pure undiluted confidence. And if there is any little dash of fear in this performance, he's hiding it oh-so-well and getting on with it anyways. I'd like to introduce you to a totally unique individual - Old Man Saxon.

Even if the LA rap music scene isn't your thing, I think you'd struggle to find fault with this entertaining clip. These few minutes near the end of the first episode were my absolute FAVE few minutes of the entire series of Rhythm & Flow on Netflix. To me this totally epitomizes being true to yourself, not being afraid to show that you're a little bit different, and just going for it despite possibly shaking in your boots. I now follow Saxon on Spotify, YouTube, and Instagram. I think he's destined to be a household name in the next couple of years. Just wait and see, and watch the clip :)

Back to confidence. I wish that I was confident all the time. Life would be so much easier if I was. At 42 years old I'm still learning how to maintain a good level of this exquisite quality.

So yes, I'm 42, I've raised an adult daughter in her early twenties, I somehow got brave enough to fly so far out of my comfort zone to the other side of the earth to start a new life, and over the years I've had to learn so many lessons on so many levels. Oh, so many lessons. In my opinion, I should be waaayyyy more confident than I am. Yet to this day this quality often eludes me. Our brains are so powerful,they shape who we are, and therefore HOW we are.

I’ve come to the conclusion that finding that element of confidence and positivity within yourself, a lot of it seems to be about finding ways to trick your subconscious, to combine that with a bit of forcing yourself through moments of fear or negativity to the other side, and all while accepting your flaws.

Tricking. Forcing. Accepting. Weirdly, a combination of these. And throw in some visualization and you're golden :)

Some of the things I've been doing to tap into my confident side are things like rotating specific screensavers on my phone (such as Wonder Woman in her power pose residing as my main screensaver). This little visual reminder every time I pick up the phone has been helpful.

Or things like heading over to my “Remember" board on Pinterest to peruse the wise words of others. Yes, I do have an entire board aimed at reminding me to believe in myself. If I'm feeling really low I'll go there and scroll for a while.

Also, guided meditation. YouTube has many good meditations I enjoy. I pop headphones on and lay down and do the meditation of my choice whenever I need, and this helps raise the spirits. Here are a few on YouTube that I find really encouraging:

Finally, I've also realized that yes, Fear with a capital F, she is here with me, she's a part of myself that I can live with, as long as I don't let her control my life. She's always been here anyways, she apparently doesn't want to leave, so I may as well give her her place. I’ve pretty much-made friends with this aspect of myself that I've always tried to squish. She's me, and she's alright. She just gets scared. And she doesn't like to be in the spotlight. But she does just fine whenever she needs to be there.

I think you just have to be confident enough to know that you'll never feel 100% confident, and furthermore, that everybody is totally winging it. We're all trying to get by, and we just need to embrace ourselves, warts - and fears - and all. And maybe just maybe we need to trick ourselves here and there, into believing that we've got this. Feel the fear and do it anyway. What's that trick? To give a speech in front of an audience, you should picture them naked? :D

I'll leave you guys with more fave image quotes from my most looked at Pinterest board.

Thanks for stopping by, and have a great day or night wherever in the world you might be.

Txx